Sunday Night Reflections and Book Recommendations

Greetings all (if anyone's reading this. If not, then "Greetings, me!")

It's been a few days since the results of our sperm test so I've had a few days to get my head around what we're actually about to sign up to. I've done lots and lots of research, including reading two fabulous books.

The first is the wonderful The Complete Guide to IVF: An Inside View of Fertility clinics and Treatment by Kate Brian (Link), which provided me with an incredible amount of detail about the whole process from start to finish. The section on ICSI, in particular, was so reassuring:

It is fascinating to watch an embryologist performing ICSI. The care and skill needed to manipulate eggs and sperm that are invisible to the human eye is remarkable, as is the confidence the embryologist has to demonstrate: holding the egg still with the pipette, while chasing the wriggling sperm with the needle and deftly slashing off the tail before sucking it up and injecting it right into the egg.

Brian, Kate. The Complete Guide To Ivf: An inside view of fertility clinics and treatment (p. 100). Little, Brown Book Group. Kindle Edition.

The second book I read, whilst being a little less detailed, nonetheless provided me with the insider's view on what it's really like to undergo fertility treatment. It's called Get a Life: His and Hers Survival Guide to IVF (Link). This is the book that had me giggling to myself in Costa and getting funny looks from other customers. Whilst Rosie's "her" sections were interesting and relatable, it was Richard's "him" sections that earned me the funny looks - probably because I have the sense of humour of a 15-year old boy. The best part, by far, involved his reflections on what it's like to wank in a fertility clinic:

About four minutes into iPhone pornography time, I heard the door open and the same mauve teenager speak to me. I turned around while hastily trying to cover up my act of self-pollution (as if she didn’t know what took place in this windowless booth). The door was closed. There was no one there. She was talking to the man in the room next door. Shitting hell. We weren’t even soundproofed.

Bray, Rosie; Mackney, Richard. Get A Life: His & Hers Survival Guide to IVF . Orion. Kindle Edition.

I read the whole book in about an hour, including the most upsetting sections on failure and miscarriage. You may think this is a little morbid and negative, but being ultra-prepared is a big thing of mine.

In other news, I've started to tell people about the IVF. Not too many, though, as it will just increase the pressure to be successful. In particular, I whatsapped two very good girlfriends of mine who also had trouble conceiving (not to the extent of needing IVF but trouble nonetheless). It felt like a massive weight off my mind and I actually shed a few tears when writing the message. In one way, it feels like admitting defeat but, in another, it feels wonderful to actually be doing something about it. I'm visiting one of the girls tomorrow and must remember to talk about something other than babies, fertility and IVF.

Baby dust to all!

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